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Paralogue 8: The Lyin' King
A ragged dark mage stumbles through a village. His clothes are worn, his hair is singed and his tome is on the verge of breaking from overuse. He's been spending the last week or so fighting off horde after horde of Risen on his own. As he shuffles through the town, he gets strange, worried looks from the townsfolk. A villager finally approaches him. Villager: Are...are you alright? ???: Eh, I could be better. Villager: Do you need any help? There's a hospital in town here if you need it. ???: Nah, I'm actually looking for someone who could fix me up, if you don't mind helping me out. Villager: Oh, sure! ???: Do you have any idea where the Shepherds are? The villager gasps and covers her mouth. Villager: Oh! The...the Shepherds. Oh dear gods. ???: What's wrong? Villager: Those thugs are camping out just outside the town. They've been making everyone here nervous for days. Word has it they've been ransacking villages all over the place. ???: What?! That can't be true! Well I happen to know at least three of them personally, so I'm going to set this straight. Villager: Oh, thank you! They're that way. ???: Thanks, miss. The dark mage finds the Shepherds and they are nothing like he expected. They're a large. strange group of unkempt, vaguely threatening people. He gets nasty looks from all of them and nervously locates their leader, Knifez. The problem is, he looks far too dirty to possibly be the prince of Waydrn. “Knifez”: Whaddya want? ???: Um, excuse me. You're...Knifez? “Knifez”: That'd be me, yeah. ???: Oh. I was told Waydrnites had more...eh, hygiene. “Knifez”: What do you want, kid? ???: Oh, right. I'm here to join. “Knifez”: 'Scuse me? We don't accept just any old schmoe 'round here. In fact, I'd sooner gut ya then recruit ya. What makes you think you're worthy? ???: Well, I happen to be the child of two of your members. “Knifez”: Eh, excuse? ???: ...Have you not...met Spencer yet? “Ike?” “Knifez”: I have no clue who yer talking about. ???: Huh. Well, I guess it falls to me to fill you in. Pardon me if I'm not good at this. Exposition is Spencer's job. I'm Mason. Nice to meet you. I traveled back in time with a group of other people who grew up in a very bad future. One where Grima rises and destroys everyone. In the future, a few couples who serve in the Shepherds now make children, and the people who came back in time are those children, all grown up and ready to save the world. The “Shepherds” look between each other, not believing what they just heard. Thug: (Boss, this guy's nutso.) “Knifez”: Well then...uh, I guess you can join, Jason. Mason: That's Mason. “Knifez”: Right, right, whatever. Mason: So uh, where are my parents? I want to say hi to them. It's been years since I've seen either one of them. “Knifez”: Uh... Mason: Oh, I should probably tell you who they are first... ~~ Days later, the real Shepherds come into a town and, everywhere they go, are avoided by the villagers at all cost. Knifez: What the hell is going on around here? Rachel, Dakota, Anna, I need you guys to do an info gathering run. Rachel: Right. Anna: Got it! Dakota: Uh, sure. As the three run off, the Shepherds start conversing, waiting for the intel to return. Janice: So, five years, eh? Justice: Yep. Kelsie: Naga fucked up! Spencer: Like I said, I don't think it was her fault. We'' were in kind of a hurry. '''Kelsie': Fucked. Up. Justice: Heh, yeah. It's okay though. I met some new friends along the way, and dad turned out to be as good as I'd heard, so it was worth it. Knifez: Even though you almost got yourself killed? Justice: Yeah...sorry about that. Did I do bad? Knifez: Well, you were brash and took too many unnecessary risks. I don't know how future me taught you that. Justice: Future you didn't. He died before I was born. Knifez: ...Oh. Never mind then. I'm here now to teach you proper strategies. Joos: I can too. Tactician and all. Janice: Or you could not. Joos: What? Spencer: What she means is that you're head tactician. You should focus on your job. Joos: Good point. Sam can do it. Sam: Until I meet my future kid, that is. Then I'll make sure they got everything they needed to know from future me. Pika: And future me. Sam: I guess. Pika: What's that supposed to mean? Sam: Oh, nothing. I've just been trying to get a rise out of Green. Joos: Oh yeah, what does our newly promoted Wyvern Lord think of meeting Sam and Pika's child next? Green: Meh. I've accepted the fact that our future child will probably join last. If they're still alive. Chloe: Hey, don't think like that! I'm sure they're fine. Pika: Wanna make bets on who'll meet their kid first? Green: No thanks. Not a gambling man. Sam: Suit yourself then. ...So are Rachel, Anna and Dakota back yet? Signele: Doesn't seem like it. I sure hope they hurry though. The things I have heard villagers say aren't good... Jayde: So I'm not the only one listening in then, good. Maggie: The bunnies are being neeeeeerds! Kelsie: Yeah, nerds. Jayde: So that's where you get it. About an hour later, the trio comes back bearing grim news. Rachel: So, if sources are to be believed, we've already been through here. Florence: But that doesn't make sense, I've never seen this place in my life. Dakota: All the townsfolk swear Knifez and the Shepherds came through here a couple days ago and ransacked the joint. Knifez: But we didn't. Joos: Oh no. Do you know what this means? Knifez: What? Sam: We've got imposters on our hands. Florence: But posing as royalty is high treason! Knifez: Sounds like we need to clean out these “Shepherds.” Any idea where they are? Anna: They should be a couple miles out. East of here. Knifez: Let's go teach those imposters who the real Shepherds are. Green: Do you think they have fake everyone? I want to meet their version of me. See if he's got as much skill on a wyvern as I do. Chloe: He might smell better than you. Green: Hey! Chloe: Heehee, you know I kid. Green: (I don't smell bad, mumble mumble...) Florence: Their version of Florence won't be nearly as hot as me. Jimmy: Or as loud, I'd be willing to bet. Sam: I could probably out-everything their Sam. Pika: Not gonna argue on that one. Knifez: Oh my god would the couples just shut up and move out already? It doesn't take long at all for the Shepherds to find the false group. “Knifez”: Hey, you there, caravan. Hand over your goods. Justice: That is not going to happen. “Knifez”: Excuse me? Do you have any idea who yer dealing with? Knifez: I reckon you don't know who you're dealing with. “Knifez”: Hey, don't backtalk royalty! Joos: Oh, I had no idea we were in the presence of royalty. Chloe: Oh, do excuse my comrades. Where are their manners? Who, pray tell, are you? “Knifez”: That's more like it. Yer talkin' to Prince Knifez of Waydrn. The real Knifez smirks and lifts a pendant around his neck, emblazoned with the crest of Waydrn's royal family. Knifez: What a coincidence. I too, happen to be Prince Knifez of Waydrn. “Knifez”: WHAT?! Green: You do know impersonating royalty is a capital offense, right? Florence: Punishable by death? Justice: Nobody pretends to be my dad and gets away with it. “Knifez”: *gulp* ATTACK! The false Shepherds attack, but the real deal are armed and prepared to battle. They strike back quickly and efficiently. Julius, having recovered from his wound, jumps into battle eagerly. Without Kate, he decides to help the other knight in the Shepherds, giving Taylor some support. Taylor: Thanks for all this help all of a sudden, Julius. Julius: It's the least I could do. 'S pretty much all I'm useful for now... Taylor: Hey, don't think like that. Danica: Or you could help me out, dad. Julius: You don't need the boost, Danica. Danica: Eh, specifics. Meanwhile, the faster mounted units easily out-speed the slower, on foot “soldiers.” Green swoops up and down through the crowd, practicing with the lance he can now use thanks to his new class. He swings and stabs at enemies with reckless abandon. The false Shepherds are woefully unprepared to face flying units, so he's mostly unopposed until a stray throwing axe nicks his shoulder. Green: Hey, that wasn't very nice. He makes a move to track down whoever threw it, but before he can, the assailant bursts into flames. Nearby, Chloe closes her fire tome and smirks. Chloe: I got your back. Green: Thanks, Chloe! Someone attempts to sneak up on Chloe, but before they can attack, an arrow sprouts from their shoulder and they cry out in pain before dropping their weapon. Chloe: Oh, hello there. Pika: You should probably make sure you're covered before you brag about having other people's backs, yeah? Chloe: I let my guard down one time... Sam: We're really good at calling that shit out. The other couple roll their eyes before they continue fighting. Not too far away, Mason sulks around the battlefield, not actively fighting against the real Shepherds. He wasn't paying attention when “Knifez's” disguise was ruined, so he is blissfully unaware of the context of this fight, assuming random battles are a thing with the Shepherds, which they are. Finally, he happens upon Florence, who's cutting down his teammates with glee. Mason: Whoa, hey. You look familiar. Florence: I'm the Exalt, I should look familiar. Mason: ...Florence? Florence: Yeah, and? Mason: You came to help us in this fight? Florence: Help? No, I'm kicking your group's ass. Mason: Wait, what? Oh no, were you fooled by a false band of Shepherds? Florence: Um, no...we're the real Shepherds. Mason: What...? Florence: The Knifez you're working under—real dirty and gross, yeah? Mason: Yeah. Florence: He's a fake. Mason: ...Are you telling me I've been tricked? Again? Florence: Yessir. Mason: Nobody. Tricks. MASON! The enraged dark mage whips out a dark tome and starts immediately laying waste to his old teammates. Florence: Holy shit. Janice: I just heard someone scream a friend's name. What's going on? Mason: Janice! You're here! Janice: Yeah, I am. And you are now too, I guess. Mason: Now. I got tricked by these thugs. Janice: Oh god damn it Mason. You gotta stop believing everything people tell you at face value. Mason: I'm working on it. Sorta. Mason and Janice briefly team up to take down some enemies, and it's not long before a second child of royalty finds them. Bohl: Ah, Mason! My dark magic user friend! We have finally found you. What a pleasant suplex! Mason: Hey Bohl. I guess I must be the last one to get here, huh? Bohl: No. Is only you and...one other by now I think. Janice: I think so too. Mason: Oh, cool. So I'm only kind of the slowest one. That makes me feel better. Janice: I can't tell if that's sarcasm or not. Mason: If it helps, I'm not great at sarcasm. Wait! If these guys lied to me about being the Shepherds, I wonder what else they lied to me about... Together, Anna and Kayla run through the group, helping each other strike down false Shepherds. Kayla: I can't believe you guys tricked people into thinking you were the Shepherds. You don't even have a cute, young mascot like we do! Anna: You mean Maggie? Kayla: No, Maggie's like a million years old. I mean me! Anna: I'm telling her you said that. Kayla: What, am I not cute enough to be our mascot? Anna: I didn't say that. Kayla: I'm honestly feeling so attacked right now, Anna. How dare you. Anna: I'm so confused. Suddenly, Kayla trips and hits the ground hard, dropping her tome just out of her reach. A woman looms above her menacingly with a sword. Kayla: I'm actually being attacked right now! Anna, help! Before the sword meets Kayla's neck, Anna swoops in and lobs off the hand of her attacker. She kicks the assailant to the ground and helps Kayla up. Kayla: Thanks. Anna: No problem, now go get your tome before someone else gets to ya. I'll take care of this chick. Kayla scrambles to get her dropped tome. However, before she can grab it, somebody steps on it and looks down at her with a vicious grin. Thug: Heh, look's like someone's defenseless. Kayla: Oh no...Uh, help? While she was away, Anna got tied up by other attackers, so she can't assist Kayla. Anna: Oh no... Kayla lets loose a scream as the thug raises his sword. He brings it down, but instead of Kayla, the sword hits the ground. In a flash, Signele had run by and dragged Kayla away from danger. She circles around and tackles the man to the ground, clawing at his chest. Signele: Nobody touches our cute human mascot! After disemboweling the attacker, Signele transforms back into human form and delivers Kayla's tome to her. Signele: Don't drop this next time, alright? Kayla: I can try. Signele: Awesome. Later! After Signele transforms back into a bunny and bounds off, Kayla's rejoined by Anna. Anna: Must be nice having your own personal bodyguard, huh? Kayla: Sometimes it comes in handy... Especially when she agrees that I'm the cute human mascot. Eventually, the battle draws to a close and leaves Mason confronting “Knifez” alongside Justice and the real thing. Mason: You tricked me, told me my parents were dead, USED me! You're going down, asshole! “Knifez”: Oh please. You act like tricking you a dumb mage like you is hard. Mason: Grah! The false Knifez jumps at Mason with his sword drawn and takes a swing. Mason ducks and quickly counterattacks with a dark spell. Mason: RUIN! Dark mist cloaks “Knifez” and an intense pain surges through his entire body. He screams and stumble backwards. He runs at Mason again, but Justice's pegasus flies by and distracts him. He raises his sword to guard against Justice's attack, but this gives Mason another chance to fling a spell at him. Mason: Take this! The dark shroud that envelops “Knifez” is thick and his screams as it sucks the life out of him are truly disturbing. When the mist dissipates, the false prince falls to the ground, twitching. Mason stands above him menacingly and switches tomes. Mason: That's a'' dark mage to you. Bolganone! ''The ground under “Knifez” explodes in a pool of lava and his screams can barely be heard over the bubbling inferno. With a huff, Mason turns to the real Knifez. Mason: I'm so sorry I got tricked. I'm not...very smart. Knifez: Hey, it's alright. At least you figured it out before we killed you. Spencer: Hey, Mason! Mason: Spencer!! I found you! Spencer: And trouble, apparently. I'm sorry you had to get tricked. Mason: Ugh, don't remind me. I hate being tricked like that. I fall for it every time... Wait, are my parents alive? Spencer: I know for a fact that they are. Mason: Awesome! Meanwhile, Green and Chloe address their minor wounds and talk about the day's events. Mason quickly and nervously approaches them. Chloe: Oh, hey. You were that dark mage I saw working for the other team, weren't you? Green: Oh no, don't tell me you're here to exact revenge. Mason: Ha ha, no. I'm actually looking for Green and Chloe. Chloe: Uh... Green: That would...be us. Mason: ...Mom? Dad? Green: Oh. The dark mage's eyes start to water. Mason: Fake Knifez....he told me you were dead. I...I didn't wanna believe him, but I did. But you're alive and... Chloe: You're one of Spencer's crew, aren't you? Mason: ...Yeah. Green: Oh man. That must have been hard, coming all the way back here just to be told your parents were dead. Mason: It was. Chloe: But we're okay! And we're gonna save the world together. As a family. Green: You adjusted to this awfully fast for all your naysaying earlier. Mason: Heh, she always did have a way of doing that. Green: Alright then. Welcome aboard, future son. Mason: Ha ha, you can just call me Mason. Green: Oh thank gods. Now let's go brag about meeting our child to Sam and Pika. Mason: Um...alright? > [ERROR] < SUPPORTS Current Party The Shepherds *Knifez. Great Lord. Captain of the Shepherds and Prince of Waydrn. Treats his men firmly but fairly. *Grace. War Cleric. An affectionate and cheeky Shepherd with a possessive streak. *Joos. Grandmaster. A traveler with no memory of the past, but a gift for tactics. *Sam. Grandmaster. The Shepherds' original, no-nonsense Tactician. *Florence. Great Lord. A Shepherd and Knifez's sister. Always ready to lend an ass-kicking. *Jimmy. Great Knight. A quiet Shepherd who knows exactly when to get to work. *Pika. Sniper. A peppy Shepherd, always ready to follow her Tactician's command *Dakota. Assassin. A formidable Waydrnite thief with a grim outlook on things. *DJ. Swordmaster. A noble from Frar who knows his way around a sword. *Chloe. Valkyrie. The downright kindest Noble Frar ever did see. *Green. Wyvern Lord. A funloving Tostian dracoknight. Has a penchant for stabbing first and asking questions later. *Bella. Falcon Knight. A Tostian “noble” whose love of her country is rivaled only by her love of her horse. *Chase. Mercenary. A Sellsword with a love of tall tales and romance. *Signele. Taguel. Last surviving inhabitant of The Domain. Also a giant bunny sometimes. *Julius. Dancer. A gifted dancer with a flair for philandering and caffeine. *Maggie. Manakete. An innocent Manakete with a penchant for theatrics. *Sarah. Wyvern Rider. A gifted Wyvern Rider who prefers the term "realistic." *Kayla. Mage. A hyperactive mage who can't wait to prove herself as more than just a kid. *Aloasa. Dark Mage. A dour Tostian with a knack for curses and hovering. *Anna. Trickster. A world-traveling merchant who loves money and big spenders. *Rachel. War Cleric. Constantly picks fights, but is better at healing than punching. *Heroi. Mercenary. Really good at what he does, but goes unnoticed until he's gone. *Joanne. Cavalier. A quiet knight who waits for the perfect moment to speak up. *Daniel. Hero. A Frarian warrior who hopes for the best but expects the worst. *Taylor. Knight. A horse-loving girl who's incidentally really bad at riding horses. Future Children *Spencer. Myrmidon. An enigmatic man who thirsts for a better world. *Danica. Trickster. A cunning, flirty girl who could rob even the greatest thieves blind. *Bohl. Mage. An confusing youth with incredible intelligence and not so great speech patterns. *Jayde. Taguel. A hyperactive Taguel obsessed with the goal of making the species thrive. *Kelsie. Troubadour. A lazy, adopted child who was given everything before the world burned. *Augustus. Fighter. A fun-loving warrior with sharp wit and even sharper axes. *Janice. Wyvern Rider. A rebellious Wyvern Rider with more love for her wyvern than herself. *Justice. Pegasus Knight. A nervous boy whose top priority is exceeding his father's expectations. *Mason. Dark Mage. An uptight mage who stands for nothing and falls for anything. Information *This paralogue was originally posted to the Total Drama Writers' Forum here. Category:Story Category:Paralogues